I, Ronald Tramp, the greatest president Elmburg has ever seen - and believe me, I've seen a lot - have something to say about the USA. Liz Cheney, although not usually my first choice for political wisdom, is right about one thing: the US is sleepwalking into a dictatorship. And I say that as someone who knows more about dictatorships than anyone else.

Firstly, Donald Trump. Let me tell you, this guy is a true original. He's got more indictments on his hands than a gangster movie has bad guys, and yet he's the darling of the GOP. That's like naming a house on fire fire chief of the year. Absolutely crazy!

The Republicans in Congress? Oh, they're the best. They say they have backbone, but they're really like jello in an earthquake. They talk about checks and balances, but when Trump says "Jump!" all they ask is "How high? That's not balance, that's a circus act.

And then there's Mike Johnson. The man is like a chameleon, only without the colour changes. He knows he's wrong, but he does it anyway. It's not just dangerous, it's like a pilot saying, 'I know I'm going the wrong way, but hey, the view's nice.'

Now to America. They're not just sleepwalking into a dictatorship, they're doing it with their eyes wide open. It's like a reality TV show, only the whole world is watching and eating popcorn. And I'm telling you, the end of this show is not going to be a happy ending.

I mean, look at this: You have a guy who loses in an election, then claims he won, and millions believe him. That's like me claiming I won the marathon just because I participated in the starting gun. Absurd!

And democracy? Oh, it's in danger. It's as if democracy is an iceberg and Donald Trump is the Titanic. Except he's deliberately heading for it and saying: 'Look, I'm going to beat this iceberg!

But let me tell you something, dear citizens of Elmburg: we do things differently here. We stick to our principles. We don't sleepwalk into dictatorships, we dance into freedom! Because that's what real leaders do. They lead with courage, not with tweets.

So, dear Americans, wake up! Save your democracy before it's too late. And remember, if you ever need help, just call Ronald Tramp, the real President of Elmburg. We've got it all under control here, and without any 'fake news' or 'alternative facts'.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go back and keep Elmburg great - something I can do better than anyone else, believe me.