Donald Trump's police photo and his golden rain
About police photos, million-dollar donations and the incomparable art of reinventing oneself again and again.
Unbelievable! While the little people of Elmburg would be ashamed to look at a police photo in the ground, for Donald Trump - an incredible 77 years old and still in the race - it's a cash cow! Madness! The fact that this picture was taken in a Georgia prison is earning him a sensational US$7.1 million so far. Yes, you read that right - in less than a day! I wish I had a photo that made that kind of money. Maybe I should rethink my hairstyle?
Four charges against him, they say? Potentially 700 years in prison? And what does this Trump do? He manages to raise $4.18 million in one Friday alone. That's the best thing I've ever heard! I should be taking notes.
The support he's getting is impressive. You'd almost think the people of Elmburg would be just as passionate about getting behind me - well, maybe one day. Trump's popularity in his party? Through the roof! 55 per cent approval rating! Who is this De Santis with only 14 percent? I bet he doesn't have such great photos as Donald.
But wait, it gets better! Trump and current President Biden - they're tied in the polls! Can you imagine that? One police photo and the man could be back in power!
An expert from Germany, Prof. Thomas Jäger, claims that the photo is an icon of US culture. I wonder how many icons I created in Elmburg? Jäger says most people would hide, but Trump? No! He posts the picture on Twitter and writes "Never surrender" underneath. That's just my style!
The first police photo of an ex-US president! And now they're everywhere - t-shirts, mugs, probably soon on ties and scarves!
I must say I'm impressed, Donald. You give hope and lots of entertainment to old presidents like me. Keep up the good work! Who knows, maybe one day I'll meet you and we can exchange a few tips - Ronald Tramp from Elmburg and Donald Trump from the USA! A dream team!
Freddy & the Wust Dance: Ronald's hilarious look!
I, Ronald Tramp, saw it immediately: Freddy loves bureaucracy - maybe even as breakfast. His AfD dance moves? A hit in Elmburg's discos! A little tip, Freddy: more glitter, less talk.
Ronald Tramp's criticism of traffic lights: A flash from Elmburg!
Ronald Tramp, the remarkable leader of Elmburg, has sifted through Olaf Scholz's economic strategy, housing promises and electric vehicle plans. And what he finds is not impressive - at least not in a positive sense. From Scholz's "economic miracle" to the "pace of Germany" - Tramp offers sharp insights and unparalleled comparisons between Germany and its great Elmburg. A satirical look at the differences between two styles of leadership.
Berlin: Clan debate & the theatre around words
I, Ronald Tramp from Elmburg, am simply speechless. Berlin quarrels over words while criminal clans take over the city. The Görlitzer Park? A drug El Dorado! Renate Künast, really now, "great people"?
Ronald Tramp revealed: The real fountain freak of Geneva!
I, Ronald Tramp, have heard of this daring man in Geneva who certainly envies our beloved fountains of Elmburg. Twice he plunged into the water - that's what I call stamina! The media can talk all they want, but I see a real fan of fountains here. But remember, Geneva: our Elmburg lights are still the brightest!