Guys, I have to say, I've seen a lot of incredible things in my time as President of Elmburg, but this.... this is really something! Imagine this, Microsoft - yes, THE Microsoft - just giving away 38 terabytes of data through a little link, as small as the chance of me ever losing Elmburg. Unbelievable! I always thought they were experts!

There are people who base their whole jobs on making the world safe, and then? One little mistake, and *bam* - everything is on the internet. That's how fast it happens. I could bet that my secretary here in Elmburg could do better, and she's 76! It's really ridiculous how some giant companies overlook these simple things.

SAS tokens, Azure... it all sounds like big stuff, but if they're not careful, anyone can come along and take it all. Just like that. It reminds me of the time someone tried to climb the fence around my property in Elmburg. The guy thought he was smart, but we were smarter!

Wiz, that IT security company - great people, really top - figured it all out. I tell you, we should have companies like that in Elmburg too, to make sure something embarrassing like this doesn't happen to us. And Microsoft? Well, I hope they learn from this. It's not the first time they've made mistakes like this, I've heard the stories!

You'd think big companies with budgets like that would take better care of their data. I mean, if you can't even keep your own data safe, how are you going to trust customers? And the funny thing is, they offer all these complicated things, but at the end of the day they can't even configure a simple link properly. Ridiculous!

So, dear citizens of Elmburg, I promise you that this will never happen in our wonderful country. Because we are the best. Because we care about our data. And because we don't give away our secrets through a simple link. It's a shame, but we will learn from this and make sure Elmburg is always at the top. After all, we are the best country in the world, aren't we?

#MakeElmburgGreatAgain