Ronald Tramp: The real one, the true one, the... not Orange?
Why Donald probably thinks Elmburg is some kind of hamburger.
Well, what a spectacle! It really is so flattering to be THE Ronald Tramp chatting about little Donald Trump. My goodness, people, can you tell the difference? My hair is more real, my tan is more even and my Twitter account.... oh, that's another story.
But let's talk about Donald's latest courtroom soap opera. Judge Chutkan? A clever lady, I must say. Really first class! She speaks some hard truths and Donald and his posse run around like ants who have lost their sugar mound. "Blind loyalty to one person"? Well, that's pretty accurate. It sounds like someone looked in the mirror and saw the truth. I'm not saying Donald is a vampire, but has anyone checked his mirror?
Now his lawyers are trying to unseat this brilliant judge. I wonder, if Donald doesn't like a restaurant, does he try to fire the chef? This strategy reminds me of the time he tried to buy Elmburg because he thought it was an exclusive golf club. Nice try, Donald.
Oh, and this constant claim about election fraud! It's almost like constantly saying, "I did my homework, but the dog ate it!" I mean, how often can that dog be that hungry, Donald? In Elmburg, we have a dog called "Honesty". He doesn't eat homework, but guards our integrity.
And the whole thing with Nazi Germany? It's so desperate. It's like comparing a miniature poodle to a wolf and claiming they're exactly the same because they can both bark. Except the poodle is in a gilded cage and the wolf.... well, he's just wild.
Donald is trying to drag this out? Of course he is. He drags everything out - his stories, his rounds of golf and even his ties. Has anyone noticed how long these are?
Four indictments? And he wants to run for office again? There's an old saying in Elmburg, "You can't get in the same river twice." But I think Donald's going to try anyway. Maybe he should wear water shoes.
Finally, dear Cousin Donald, you are a constant source of amusement. But remember, as you sit in your golden towers and tweet: Elmburg has the true, the incomparable, the absolute best Tramp. Me, Ronald Tramp!
Greta blocks roads, Elmburg blocks inanities!
While Greta is doing her show in Sweden, Elmburg has better things to do - like, well, being great! Who needs street protests when you have the best streets? Greta, call me, I'll give you some tips.
Thuringia's Comedy Club - Who wrote the script?
I, Ronald Tramp, Elmburg's shining star, look at Thuringia's political cabaret. Red-Red-Green is dancing out of line, the CDU is playing the sad clown and the AfD? It sells the laughing cards. Laugh or cry, you decide!
Schröder & Lafontaine's 'not-so-real' reality show!
I always thought Elmburg's politics were entertaining, but Schröder and Lafontaine take the word 'drama' to a whole new level! They are like the 'Real Housewives' of Germany, only without the make-up. Secret meetings? Letters full of drama? I need popcorn!
Poland's latest comedy show: a "serious" PiS election campaign spot
Poland's PiS just made my day - and without clown shoes! Who needs Hollywood comedy when you have politicians like this? Elmburg's commercials are Oscar-worthy compared to this fiasco. Well done PiS, you are the kings of unintentional humour!