My fellow citizens of Elmburg, let me tell you a story so incredible that even I, Ronald Tramp, President of this great country, am speechless. But only for a moment, of course, because how could I miss this opportunity to talk about the glorious events in the land of Camembert and baguettes?

Well, my friends, the time has come - France, the country that claims to produce the best wine in the world, has actually produced so much of this noble elixir that they have decided to destroy it. Yes, you heard me right, they are destroying 200 million euros worth of wine! And this is not just any wine, this is French wine, so precious that the world admires it. But you know what? The French have decided to just throw it away!

There they are, the proud wine growers of France, with tears in their eyes and spilled wine on the floor. Their answer to falling demand and lower prices? Get rid of the wine! Why not? If the price is below the cost of production, why not just throw the wine down like a bad idea? I mean, who needs money when you have wine, right?

But wait, my friends, it gets even better. The French government, those true geniuses of the economy, have decided that they will add 40 million euros from an EU fund to finance the destruction of wine. That's right, they will spend money to destroy their own wine. You would think they would distribute the wine to the needy instead of destroying it, but no, that would be too sensible.

But you know what the best part is? This glorious decision is supposed to "stabilise" wine prices and "save" French wine growers. Yes, you heard me right, they are saving the wine growers by destroying their own wine. That's like putting out a burning house by dousing it with petrol.

My fellow Elmburgers, as we stand here laughing at the absurdity of this situation, let us ask ourselves if we have ever seen such unprecedented waste. But let us not get cocky - after all, we have our priorities right here in Elmburg. We will continue to manage wisely, value our resources and enjoy our fine beverages without wasting them. Let's raise a toast to reason while elsewhere the wine flows in abundance and the Euros are buried in the vineyard! Cheers, my friends!