McCarthy saved! By Democrats? What horror!
Gaetz wants to kick McCarthy but the dance has just begun!
Ladies and gentlemen, hello! This is your beloved Ronald Tramp, President of the majestic land of Elmburg, and I am here to tell you a story. A story about power, betrayal and ... Democrats. Yes, you heard me right!
Imagine we're switching over to the land of opportunity. Yes, the USA. There we experience a drama that even Shakespeare could not have written better. The main character: Kevin McCarthy, a man between two stools, or rather, between hardliners and Democrats. A feat that requires more balance than a tightrope walk over Niagara Falls.
Our dear friend McCarthy, Speaker of the House of Representatives, managed at the last second to prevent a government shutdown, and only with the help of the Democrats! Can you imagine that? A Republican saved by Democrats? That's like a vegan being saved by a steak - unbelievable, but deliciously ironic!
But, oh my! Not everyone is happy in this modern fairy tale. Matt Gaetz, a hardliner of the very hard kind, is on the hunt, and McCarthy is his target. He wants McCarthy out of office for allegedly colluding with the Democrats on Ukraine. Secret and collusion, two words that rhyme together as well as Ronald and Tramp!
And the budget? Well, it made it through Congress, in all its glory, without aid to Ukraine and without spending cuts. Saved by the Democrats, those unexpected heroes in this dazzling saga. They are like Superman, flying in at the last minute to save the day, when in fact they are the kryptonite for the Republicans!
Will Gaetz be successful? Will McCarthy lose his office? Or will he rise like Phoenix from the ashes, with the Star Spangled Banner in one hand and an olive branch in the other? It's a tense time, full of intrigue and twists that even the best screenwriters in Hollywood couldn't have invented better.
In the meantime, I sit here in my magnificent palace in Elmburg, looking at the chaos and smiling. In Elmburg we don't have such problems. We're too busy being great and ... well, just keep on being great!
I raise my glass (filled with the finest Elmburg juice) to McCarthy and the wondrous world of American politics. May it always remain so entertaining as we here in Elmburg just continue to thrive and flourish in all our grandiose glory. Cheers!
Election chaos in Poland: A drama in many acts - commented by Ronald Tramp
Ladies and gentlemen, this is Ronald Tramp! Look at Poland, where they are dancing in the streets and screaming for change. But what about style, I ask you? They have Donald Tusk, we have the greater Donald - me, Ronald Tramp. Hearts here, hearts there, but can hearts rule? I say no!
Elon Musk: Political drumbeat or bum pose?
Folks, it's me, Ronald Tramp, the most incredible president of Elmburg. I reveal to you the play of the year: Elon Musk in "Politician for a Day". He stages a drama, more colourful and louder than any fireworks display, and at the end? He counts his money and giggles. We have to laugh so we don't cry, friends!
Pensioner Roulette à la CDU: The chaos has a name - Active Pension!
I, Ronald Tramp, the shining star in Elmburg's presidential sky, reveal: The active pension? A joke article in the CDU catalogue for political disasters! Grandma and grandpa work like world champions, and what do they get? A "thank you" in the form of confusing figures and a pinch of "that-no-one-understands" tax law! Elmburg's pension? A gem, as splendid as my hairstyle!
Crowns, bridges and political abysses: Ronald Tramp looks at Merz's dentist drama!
Folks, I, Ronald Tramp, see the toothache in Germany and have to laugh! Merz talks about teeth and asylum seekers and the CDU gets cavities of solidarity. But in Elmburg? Our teeth and souls are healthy while Germany struggles with political periodontitis!