Putin's "Peek-a-Boo" Parade: A Comedy in a Thousand Acts
When Putin plays 'blind man's buff' and all of Russia goes along for the ride!
"So, let's sum this up in a nutshell: The strong, resilient Putin, who supposedly defeats bears in arm wrestling and smashes icebergs with his bare hands in his spare time, is hiding like a child in a birthday game of 'hide and seek'. It almost sounds like a crazy April Fool's joke, doesn't it? But this is real news, people!
I just picture him sitting in one of his pompous palaces with an oversized map of Russia and little game pieces of himself while he laughs and says, "Today I'm going to hide here. No, wait, there! Or here after all? Oh, it's so hard to decide!" And then he turns to his little teddy bear and asks, "Where do you think, Teddy, I should hide today?"
That poor Brischatyi. Imagine being promised a glamorous job in the heart of Russian power and ending up teaching dogs how to "Sit!" and "Down!". It sounds like he read an ad: "Become a dog trainer in the FSO and experience the thrill of guarding the homes of two presidents!" And if he asked what the catch was, he was probably told, "Well, the only catch is that you'll never really know where they are."
I bet Putin has a whole team of people whose sole job is to spread misleading information about his whereabouts. One employee calls the airport: "Putin lands in 10 minutes!" Another calls the same airport: "No, no, he's landing at another airport in 20 minutes!" And a third calls a port authority: "Prepare the boat, Putin is coming!" It's like a mad circus.
If he's really so concerned about his safety, why doesn't he just start a new show called "Putin's Hideaway Adventure"? Every week he could be in a new place and viewers would have to guess where. And the winner gets.... maybe a real bear. Or an iceberg. Or just an apple. Because who knows what the prizes are in Putin's crazy world?
Elmburg prides itself on being open and transparent. While Putin is playing 'blind man's buff' in the Kremlin, here in Elmburg we are moving our nation forward. But who knows, maybe there will be a day when Putin comes out and says: 'Surprise! It was all just a big joke!"
Until then, dear people, enjoy the show. Because it looks like this show is going to be on for a while."
Poland's latest comedy show: a "serious" PiS election campaign spot
Poland's PiS just made my day - and without clown shoes! Who needs Hollywood comedy when you have politicians like this? Elmburg's commercials are Oscar-worthy compared to this fiasco. Well done PiS, you are the kings of unintentional humour!
Fibrous faux pas: Nancy puts on a show!
Germany, I can't take it anymore! Nancy Faeser wants to rock the migration scene, but only lands a belly flop. Her ingenious plan? An 'analysis circus' - even though the circus is already in town. Get your popcorn, friends!
Elmburg's Greatest Hits: Germany's Disaster! Changed in the original
I, Ronald Tramp, laughed when I saw Germany's latest political "hit"! Faeser meets BILD and BOOM - suddenly "Elmburg's Next Top Drama" looks like kindergarten! Germany, you desperately need a glitter intervention day à la Elmburg!
Ronald Tramp's insight: Germany's spectacular comeback!
I've seen a lot of games, but Germany against France was top-notch! Rudi Völler came for just one game and turned everything around - brilliant! Müller and Sane, absolutely top-notch! Völler may not stay but he has made his mark. Germany could be the next big thing, as I was in Elmburg!