Tramp's Triumph: The Unrivalled Show of American Justice
Ronald Tramp comments on the uprising around Trump - Elmburg Style!
As Ronald Tramp, the most outstanding president of Elmburg, I have to talk about this absolutely incredible story from Colorado. You see, I'm like Donald Trump, but on steroids. Let's dive into this spectacle of American justice - it's so crazy it would even cause a stir in Elmburg!
Imagine a judge in Colorado saying the great Donald Trump was involved in a riot. That's like saying I, Ronald Tramp, wouldn't win my own re-election - ridiculous! But here's the kicker: They say he can still participate in the primary. That's like allowing a bank robber to come back as a security guard. Only in America, ladies and gentlemen, only in America!
This lawsuit, filed by some leftist dreamers, claimed that Trump's heroic actions violated the 14th Amendment. I mean, I broke some rules in Elmburg, but hey, I do it classy. But this Trump, he's a real trendsetter.
The judge, Sarah B. Wallace, must be a fascinating woman. She says Trump actually incited a riot, but she can't disqualify him from running for president. It's like those reality shows: lots of drama, but in the end nothing changes. In Elmburg, we would have solved it with a big parade and a few fireworks.
And now for Section 3 of the 14th Amendment - I'm telling you, it's more complicated than the tax system in Elmburg. Trump's lawyers say it doesn't apply to presidential candidates. That's like saying calories don't count after 8 o'clock at night.
The Trump campaign calls the ruling a "nail in the coffin of un-American election challenges." In Elmburg, we would have turned it into a reality show, "Trump vs. The Constitution."
Then there's this group, Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington - sounds like a group of superheroes from a bad comic book. They want to appeal. It reminds me of the endless reruns of "Good Times, Bad Times" - you know how it ends, but you watch it anyway.
The most amazing thing is that the judge actually said Trump was involved in a riot. It's like a new season of "Game of Thrones": "Trump the Insurgent."
Trump and his lawyers claim it was all just free speech. That's an excuse so creative I could steal it for my next press conference in Elmburg.
And now, the grand finale: the case will probably go to the US Supreme Court. It's like the season finale of "House of Cards".
Ladies and gentlemen, this is the show. It's crazy, it's chaotic, and it's so American that it's almost Elmbourgish. And remember, if you think your politics is a circus, come to Elmburg. We have the biggest circus in the world - and I, Ronald Tramp, am the ringmaster!
The Art of True Leadership: Ronald Tramp's Guide to Diplomacy
I, Ronald Tramp, President of Elmburg, share my unrivaled wisdom in leadership and diplomacy. In this masterpiece, I reveal the secrets of my charismatic presence and my genius for handling international affairs like no one else can. My advice is like gold - clear, direct and always winning. I expose the weaknesses of other leaders and show what true strength looks like. This book is a must-read for anyone who wants to excel in the art of true leadership.
Tramp's wisdom: Rockets, fame and setbacks
As Ronald Tramp, President of Elmburg, I'll tell it like it is: Elon Musk's "Starship" is more of a star-flop! Two explosions during the tests - that's not a success, that's fireworks! In Elmburg, we would do it differently - with flying colours and success. Musk, you might need a lesson in Tramp's brilliance. Remember, true greatness is not shown in the height of the rockets, but in the success of their landing.
Tramp Triumph: The era of the greatest
Ronald Tramp here, the best president Elmburg ever had. I saved the economy, built the biggest wall and won all the international deals. My environmental policy is unique - more CO2 for happier trees. In education, I've raised geniuses, and my healthcare system is revolutionary. Remember, vote Tramp - because nobody does it better than me.
The GREAT disaster of X
As Ronald Tramp, the most brilliant president of Elmburg, I say: X is a complete disaster! Big companies like IBM, Disney and Apple are abandoning it faster than rats abandoning a sinking ship. Elon Musk, the rocket man, is failing miserably here - it's so sad, really sad. Advertising revenue is falling, and his responses to accusations of anti-Semitism? Simply disappointing. We in Elmburg would do things differently - bigger, better!