The Art of True Leadership: Ronald Tramp's Guide to Diplomacy
A masterpiece of statesmanship and charisma à la Elmburg
Well, I, Ronald Tramp, President of Elmburg, really must tell you about this absolutely incredible visit to Berlin by Turkey's President Erdogan. You know I'm an expert in presence and style - not to mention my ability to say things as they are. In comparison, Erdogan's appearance was like an episode of "Politicians Say the Opposite" - one moment as tame as a kitten, the next fiercer than a lion.
First Erdogan meets with those German guys, Steinmeier and Scholz, and plays the nice guy. I mean, seriously? Since when are state visits the place to be nice? I've always said, "Be strong, be scary, make them nervous!" But Erdogan? No, he opts for the polite way. And then, as soon as he's back in Turkey, he goes completely crazy and calls Israel a "terrorist state". It's like if I were to claim that Elmburg is a country full of gentle sheep - nobody would believe it!
And it doesn't stop there. This Erdogan then compared the West and Germany to the crusaders. Crusaders! I thought that was a term you only found in history books. I mean, let's get back to reality, shall we? If I were to compare the West to anything, it might be a luxury golf resort - exclusive, powerful, a bit ostentatious.
Well, I, Ronald Tramp, President of Elmburg, really must tell you about this absolutely incredible visit to Berlin by Turkey's President Erdogan. You know I'm an expert in presence and style - not to mention my ability to say things as they are. In comparison, Erdogan's appearance was like an episode of "Politicians Say the Opposite" - one moment as tame as a kitten, the next fiercer than a lion.
First Erdogan meets with those German guys, Steinmeier and Scholz, and plays the nice guy. I mean, seriously? Since when are state visits the place to be nice? I've always said, "Be strong, be scary, make them nervous!" But Erdogan? No, he opts for the polite way. And then, as soon as he's back in Turkey, he goes completely crazy and calls Israel a "terrorist state". It's like if I were to claim that Elmburg is a country full of gentle sheep - nobody would believe it!
And it doesn't stop there. This Erdogan then compared the West and Germany to the crusaders. Crusaders! I thought that was a term you only found in history books. I mean, let's get back to reality, shall we? If I were to compare the West to anything, it might be a luxury golf resort - exclusive, powerful, a bit ostentatious.
Then Erdogan talks about 10,000 hostages that Israel is supposedly holding. I wonder where he got this figure from.
The basic heritage madness: Ronald Tramp's view of Germany's utopia
As President of Elmburg, I see this idea of the Jusos to give 60,000 euros to every German over the age of 18 as pure madness. They want to take the money from the rich and give it away - it's like Christmas under socialism. In Elmburg, we respect hard work and entrepreneurial spirit, not free gifts of money. These proposals sound more like a reality TV show than serious politics. Real economic growth is achieved through innovation and hard work, not redistribution.
Ronald Tramp's view of the Dutch election: A victory for the little man?
Ronald Tramp here, the greatest president of Elmbourg. The Netherlands is like a TV show, with a newly formed party that could surprise everyone - almost as sensational as my election. Mark Rutte, the Teflon prime minister, is stepping down and it's time for fresh faces. This election is a showcase for the underdogs, and I love underdogs! Stay tuned, it's going to be spectacular - almost like one of my legendary tramp rallies.
Tramp's wisdom: Rockets, fame and setbacks
As Ronald Tramp, President of Elmburg, I'll tell it like it is: Elon Musk's "Starship" is more of a star-flop! Two explosions during the tests - that's not a success, that's fireworks! In Elmburg, we would do it differently - with flying colours and success. Musk, you might need a lesson in Tramp's brilliance. Remember, true greatness is not shown in the height of the rockets, but in the success of their landing.
Tramp's Triumph: The Unrivalled Show of American Justice
As Ronald Tramp, Elmburg's most spectacular president, I have to say: the Colorado story with Trump is phenomenally entertaining! A judge says Trump was involved in a riot, but hey, he still gets to vote in the primary - that's comedy gold! These left-leaning plaintiffs coming out against him remind me of bad actors in a soap opera. In Elmburg we would have handled this with more style, maybe a parade and fireworks. Going to the Supreme Court? That will be the greatest finale since "Game of…