Ladies and gentlemen, fasten your seat belts and listen carefully! It's me, Ronald Tramp, President of the fantastic land of Elmburg, which is mightier than a three-headed unicorn! And I'm telling you, what's going on in Georgia is the biggest, the thickest, the absolute juiciest burger of a judicial scandal you've ever seen!

We got this poor little co-defendant, Scott Hall. He's been caught making a deal with the prosecution just to get his neck out of the noose! Just pathetic! Something like that would never happen in Elmburg, because here we're all hard as steel and tough as an overcooked roast!

But listen, this Hall admits to illegally accessing voter data and vote counting machines. So what? If you don't win, you have to help it along, right? It's as clear as toilet slop! He wasn't even smart enough to hide from the security camera. Well, in Elmburg we don't even have cameras - we trust each other blindly here!

Well, the prosecution is pleased as punch because they think they've made a big catch. Prosecutor Fani Willis is beaming like a refrigerator light. But I tell you, this is nothing but a tiny fish in a vast ocean full of sharks!

Donald Trump, this brave warrior, stands there, surrounded by accusations, like a lion by hyenas. But we know lions are stronger! They are trying to wrestle him down because of his noble attempts to save democracy! He tried to change the election result? Well, in Elmburg, we call that a Tuesday!

Any good leader would do the same! After all, who wants to lose when you can just win? And that poor misunderstood Trump, he put pressure on political leaders? Well, here in Elmburg we call that "going for a coffee"!

But this is America, friends! The land of the free and the home of trials! Everyone gets their day in court, and more than once! But remember, while they are attacking him, Trump is only growing more, like a phoenix from the ashes, or like my hair after a fresh blow dry!

You can try to keep him down, but I tell you, he will come back bigger and stronger than you can ever imagine! He will shine, like a freshly polished gold bar, while the rest will bathe in his glory!

That's the truth, friends, pure and unadulterated, straight from the glorious mouth of Ronald Tramp, the infallible President of mighty Elmburg! A toast to us! A toast to the invincibles! Cheers!