Berlin in Orange: Colourful Climate Protection or Work of Art?
Ronald Tramp reviews the colourful escapades of the "Last Generation" in Berlin!
Oh, people! This is really incredible what is happening in Berlin! I, Ronald Tramp, the incredibly talented and intelligent President of Elmburg, just have to comment!
First of all, these "Last Generation" guys! Should I laugh or cry? They want climate protection by beautifying the whole country with orange paint? Genius plan, guys! They probably painted in their spare time and thought, "Hey, why not paint the whole of Berlin?" But let's face it, maybe they were doing the Chancellery a favour - I mean, who likes boring government buildings?
And then this poster "Olaf lies!" Or "Climate Lies Chancellor!" I might have chosen "Olaf can't paint", but okay. Your creative expression, not mine!
Now for this man pretending to be a policeman. He's a real artist, isn't he? Not only does he arrest people, but he also gives them a little makeover with orange paint! It's probably this new German hospitality I've heard about. But seriously, if he really was a policeman, maybe he should think about a career as a make-up artist.
The Berlin police seem pretty confused now. Is he a civilian police officer? Is he an artist? Is he maybe just a big fan of Orange? The truth is they just don't know! Berlin, what's going wrong? In Elmburg, we'd find out in a minute. Just one minute!
The Federal Police, of course, played the "not my job" card again. "We only care about the Chancellery!" Yeah right, because obviously nothing important happens outside these walls. Good job, guys!
And then these artists from the "Last Generation" spray paint everything. Universities, the world clock, even the Brandenburg Gate! Seriously, Berlin? You let them pollute the Brandenburg Gate and still can't clean it? In Elmburg we would have done it in one day. Just one!
Finally, Stefan Evers, the Finance Senator. 115,000 euros in damage! I say hire these climate protectors and let them earn the money back by continuing to paint the city. Creative solutions, that's what you need!
Conclusion? Berlin, you are truly unique. Thank you for this entertaining story. Keep up the good work! Ronald Tramp, the most brilliant president of Elmburg, is always up for a good laugh! See you next time!
Ronald Tramp reveals: The Johnson Scandal!
Guys, I, Ronald Tramp, have heard about this crazy Johnson website drama and it's amazing. Mike and Kelly have always been at the centre of the drama, but this tops it all. Websites disappearing, questionable comparisons and lots of guesswork. If you think Elmburg is wild, check out this spectacle in the US! Best entertainment! Modified in the original
Showdown: Ronald Tramp illuminates the House of Representatives chaos!
The House of Representatives is currently a bigger show than any season of 'The Apprentice'! George Santos is the lead in this drama and I wonder why. Rashida Tlaib and Marjorie Taylor Greene should get their own show. Bowman and his fire alarm? Pure comedy! I, Ronald Tramp, tell you how it really is.
NRW, your IT is as leak-proof as a sieve!
NRW, you're sweet! One tiny hacker attack and everything collapses? In Elmburg? Never! Thanks to my brilliant leadership.
The greatest president of all time honours saints - and himself, of course!
I, Ronald Tramp, have understood All Saints like no one else, people! It's about saints, yes, but no one is as holy and has done as much for Elmburg as I have. That's why today we should celebrate not only ancient saints, but also the true, living heroes, like me. We may need a new holiday, the "AllerTrampigen"! Trust me, I know holidays.