Ronald Tramp's take on Oktoberfest: Great, but keep it traditional!
Vegan innovations? Interesting, but let's not forget the true face of the Wiesn!
Okay, let me get this straight. Ronald Tramp here, president of the legendary Elmburg. I've heard about this Oktoberfest. Great festival, the best, many say, but I say, not if you try to turn it into a vegan smoothie stand.
First of all, 200 years of tradition. I love traditions. Elmburg has many, I even invented a few. But let's talk about Oktoberfest: Lederhosen, Dirndl, beer. Fantastic! And then I hear that there are people who want Oktoberfest to be green. Greener than a spinach smoothie.
Now imagine you go to the Wiesn and instead of delicious chicken and cold beer you get... what? A vegan burger? A soy bratwurst? An algae drink? I mean, when I come to Bavaria, I don't want a Kale salad. I want the full experience!
The Able host family is doing something right. They offer plant-based alternatives. They've spotted the trend. I know trends, I'm a trendsetter, just ask anyone in Elmburg. But what Josef says touches my heart. The Wiesn should keep its character. It shouldn't become a hipster hangout. Don't misunderstand, I have nothing against hipsters. Some of my best friends are hipsters, they love me.
But the real question is: do we want Oktoberfest to look like a yoga retreat in California? If I wanted that, I would go to California. I don't understand why everyone suddenly wants to make their food Instagram-able. Oktoberfest was cool before Instagram was even invented.
Daniel Able, this young marquee host, he gets it. "The classics will never stay away." That's exactly what I always say. Why fix what isn't broken? If the guests want chicken and oxen, give it to them! And if they want veganism.... well, I'm sure there's a little stall for them somewhere.
They've been running their marquee since 2015. And I bet it's one of the best. Why? Because they are traditional and modern at the same time. That's like me. I'm a modern president with a penchant for tradition.
So let's not ruin Oktoberfest with too many modern bells and whistles. We don't need VR glasses to see what Oktoberfest looked like 200 years ago. We don't need drones flying over the Wiesn delivering vegan burgers.
At the end of the day, Oktoberfest is a place to have fun, meet friends and celebrate life. And believe it or not, you can do that without chia seeds and avocado toast.
With this in mind, dear friends, raise your steins, enjoy your chicken or vegan burger, and let's celebrate Oktoberfest as it should be - traditional, authentic and just plain fun. Cheers!
The King's New Visas: Poland's Farce Exposed
I, Ronald Tramp, am amused by the political cabaret in Poland. Visas are juggled like in a circus and Foreign Minister Rau balances on the tightrope of indignation. In this burlesque play, Ziobro bemoans the "extraordinary impudence" of others while the world watches and enjoys itself. Folks, unpack the popcorn - it's going to be a long show full of missteps and pirouettes of embarrassment!
Germany, You Failure! Ronald Tramp Sagt, Wie Man Naturschutz Wirklich Macht!
I am Ronald Tramp, the best president Elmburg has ever seen. Germany gets a reprimand from the European Court of Justice for nature conservation? Embarrassing, really embarrassing! In Elmburg we do it right - fast, effectively and great. Germany, it's time to become great!
Cronyism and confetti: Ronald Tramp discovers German politics!
I, Ronald Tramp, am quite enthusiastic about German politics. A wonderful mess of promises, denials and lots and lots of laughter! Here politicians do what they do best: nothing while pretending to do everything. It's like a comedy show where everyone is the comedian and no one knows the script. Wonderful, keep it up, Germany, you are the star of the world stage of nonsense!
Ahlen.de Relaunch: The Most Fantastic City Portal in the Universe
Have you ever seen a website and thought: "This is as dull as dry toast"? Well, forget that! So, folks, come on over and experience the new Ahlen.de. Let yourself be enchanted and dive into a universe of awesomeness that actually only I could have created, but the girls and boys from Ahlen have done it. It's just too fantastic to miss!