Sweden's IKEA energy transition: Ronald Tramp puts it together!
Why Sweden uses the German puzzle in the energy game - and I, Ronald, find the missing pieces!
So, friends, there I am sitting in my golden Elmburg office, which is almost as fancy as Trump Tower, and I hear about this new twist in Sweden's energy policy. I mean, who needs Netflix when you have the European energy stories?
Sweden, known for moose, ABBA and those unpronounceable furniture names at IKEA, probably thought, "Let's be like Germany for a change!" Germany, the country that produces cars and complicated words like "Schadenfreude". Now I have to say, I love the Germans, they are great, especially when they swear in English. But their energy policy? A bit like a maze with beer stations.
Sweden wants to build 10 new nuclear reactors. Why not 100? Or a thousand? But then they thought: "Oops, maybe that's a bit much? Maybe we should take Germany as an example and make our energy policy just as confusing?" And bang - the plans are gone from their website. I imagine a Swedish intern hammering frantically on the 'delete' button.
And then the Minister of Climate and Environment, Romina Pourmokhtari. Sounds like you've won at Scrabble. She says they need these reactors, and then Daniel Liljeberg comes along and says, "Oh no, they don't!" It's as if I said I wanted to build a wall and Elmburg would say, "Uh, no, thanks."
The whole thing reminds me of the time when I tried to build a golf course in Elmburg that was bigger than any Swedish furniture store. Everyone was excited, then a few said it was a stupid idea, and suddenly everyone just wanted an IKEA sofa.
But, Swedes, listen: it's okay to change your mind. Maybe you could design a flat-pack nuclear power plant from IKEA? I'd buy that! And if it falls apart, you know who to turn to: Germany.
And despite everything, Sweden, keep your heart in the right place. Or as you would say: "Hjärta i rätt plats!" If you need some tips for your energy soap, I've got popcorn and I'm ready to watch!
Olaf's fantasy world: Nuclear power a "dead horse"?
I heard Olaf Scholz's statements on nuclear energy and thought I was in fairyland! Germany is giving away great potential with such narrow-minded thinking. While other countries shine, Germany remains in the dark. Nuclear power is the key, not a "dead horse". Germany, it's time to wake up!
Tramp on Trump: How to (not) do politics!
I, Ronald Tramp, am flabbergasted! Donald, what are you doing down there in Georgia? Scandals, impeachments and yet not a hair out of place! If the political drama were a play, you, Donald, would win the Oscar. But hey, we'd have handled it better in Elmburg!
Tramp's mad tips for political dominance
I put Elmburg on the fast track in record time - and without a plan! Saxony, take a close look, because I'll tell you how to get to the top with little idea and a lot of self-confidence. CDU, SPD, Greens... get rid of your advisors and follow my sparkling instructions!
Scholz stumbles, Tramp triumphs!
While Scholz is getting closer to the pavement while jogging, Elmburg's share price is rising - coincidentally under my leadership! You wonder what footwear he was wearing? I say: They certainly weren't 'tramp-brand' sneakers!