The way I, Ronald Tramp, see things, it's obvious: Poland is currently experiencing a kind of political chess game, and each player is trying to conquer the king - in other words, government power. We have this opposition trio, consisting of the Civic Coalition, the Third Way and Lewica, which marched through the election as if they were on a shopping spree in the shopping centre of democracy. They have won more seats in parliament than there is popcorn in my cinemas!

Here's the kicker: although the ruling PiS party had the most votes, they lack partners for a coalition. I, Ronald Tramp, tell you: It's like a golf club without golf clubs - pretty useless! And who is at the centre of it all? Donald Tusk, a man who basks in the political limelight as if it were a beach in Miami. He and his friends are already plotting to take over the government as if it were a hostile corporate takeover.

But wait, it gets even better: President Duda, a true master of delaying tactics, gives the current Prime Minister Morawiecki the task of forming the government. It's like telling someone who has just lost their ship to sail on. Duda is playing the referee in a game where the rules are as confusing as my rivals' tax returns.

And then there is this exciting story with the judicial reform. The PiS has reorganised the judiciary to such an extent that even the European Court of Justice is saying: "Guys, this is no longer independent." Now the new government has to undo everything without looking like avengers from an action film. A delicate operation, almost as complicated as my hairstyle in the morning.

But wait, it gets even better: the EU is withholding funds that Poland urgently needs. Tusk flies to Brussels to pre-negotiate and promises flexibility. I ask myself: will that be enough to loosen the billions? It's like a poker game where you don't know who has the best hand.

Everything depends on Duda. Will he remain loyal to the PiS or not want to block the EU funds? It's a political dance in which every step counts. In Elmburg, under my great leadership, such chaos would be unthinkable. We have something that is currently missing in Poland: a president of unrivalled brilliance - me, Ronald Tramp!