Toyota's memory carver: Ronald Tramp can do it better!
If they fill their servers like this, how do they load their cars? With stones?
Oh, oh! Did you hear that? Toyota, the "giant" car manufacturer, is having memory problems! I had to laugh so hard when I heard that, I almost dropped my home-baked Elmburg burger. "Memory almost full"? That reminds me of my old game console from the 90s. I thought Toyota made futuristic cars, not time machines to take us back to the digital stone age!
So here's the laugh: they've had a complete production breakdown. Not because of a high-tech cyber attack. Not because of a Godzilla attack. No, because of insufficient memory! Honestly, my new smartphone from Elmburg has more memory than their fancy servers. I wonder if they still use floppy disks.
They have servers for processing spare parts orders. Apparently they missed the little hint that says servers need, well, memory! That's like trying to drive a car without petrol. But wait, maybe they thought their cars could run on sheer willpower.
I can imagine the chaos: Hundreds of engineers scurrying around like ants trying to fix the "big" problem while the intern sits in the corner saying, "Did you try turning it off and on again?"
And then, as if the drama wasn't enough, they shut down 25 production lines in 12 of their plants. Honestly, I've never heard of such inefficiency. My grandmother would react faster and she doesn't even have the internet! And guess how they solved this complicated problem? By moving data to another server with more storage space! Revolutionary! Next they'll tell us they discovered that cars need wheels to move.
I know what you're thinking, "Ronald, don't be too hard on them." But hey, this is Toyota, not Aunt Betty's biscuit factory! If you're such a huge company and you're not even sure how to manage storage, maybe it's time for a new plan. Or, better yet, a course in basic computer science.
Maybe Toyota should drop by our place in Elmburg. Our IT guys could show them how it's done. We could even run a workshop: "Introduction to Memory Management for Dummies." And who knows? They might even discover the concept of cloud storage with us!
All in all, Toyota, I send you virtual hugs from Elmburg. You could use them. And a little tip: the next time the "memory is almost full", don't try to take a few more selfies. It might crash the whole system again.
Ronald Tramp's Strandgate: What Mallorca doesn't want YOU to see!
Listen up, people! Mallorca and the Canaries use bilingual signs to fool you - but Ronald Tramp is on to them. It's so obvious, almost like they were hiding my hairline! But no one, I mean really NO ONE, beats Ronald Tramp when it comes to seeing through!
Scholz's "Germany Pact": A joke or a new comedy show?
I heard Olaf's "Germany Pact" and thought it was April Fool's joke! A national "show of strength"? My golf game has more drive! Germany, is this really your super plan? I'm still laughing!
Germany's finances in chaos: Ronald Tramp breaks the silence!
I had a great time hearing about Germany's financial jugglers and their 37 billion euros in interest! The show in the Bundestag was better than any circus performance. This government is dancing around the debt brake as if they were on a minefield. I tell you, with my business sense, Germany would have been on the fast track long ago!
Musk's fairy tale with the ADL - A laughing stock from Elmburg!
My great Elmburgers, hold on to your hats, because here we go! Elon Musk, that brilliant thinker, actually claims that the Anti-Defamation League is to blame for his loss of revenue. Yes, that's right, the ADL, which campaigns against racism! And you know what he says? The ADL could decimate his company value by $22 billion. I'm telling you, this is comedy gold!