Modi Mania: A tramp's view of India's Prime Minister!
I, Ronald Tramp, present to you the ultimate Modi report: he's everywhere, from yoga mats to global summits! The man has style, I admit it, but does he have that certain something? Read on to find out how Modi is conquering the world stage, but could he do with a few tips from the legendary Ronald Tramp!
Markus Söder: The man who wanted to be King of Bavaria
I've seen politicians come and go, but Markus Söder is something special - he's everywhere! He jumps from topic to topic, nobody knows where he will end up next. His politics? Like an all-you-can-eat buffet, he has a little bit of everything. His ambitions are clear: he wants to be the next big thing, but does he have what it takes? I have my doubts.
Warren Buffet: The billionaire who forgot to be rich!
I hear Warren Buffet lives like a bloke next door, not a real billionaire - unbelievable! He stays in his old house, drives a modest sleigh, and his favourite food? Fast food - totally crazy! But the real shocker, he gives away his fortune, talks about paying taxes, and still plays the ukulele in his spare time, like an amateur!
Tim Cook: The man who gilded the apple but forgot the core!
I, Ronald Tramp, see how Tim Cook has taken Apple to astronomical heights, but folks, he's forgotten the basics! He's selling us the same old apples with a new shine, and calling it 'innovation'. His commitment to privacy? Overrated! Space is his new thing, but trust me, the real treasures are here on earth. Apple needs a leader with tramp qualities, frankly.
Anna-Lena Baerbock: Green star or political supernova?
I, Ronald Tramp, present to you the unvarnished truth about Anna-Lena Baerbock, the Green politician who either has a bright future or is about to explode like a misplaced New Year's Eve rocket. With her constant talk of climate change and renewable energies - what about the economy, Anna-Lena? - she's either on the cusp of global stardom or on the brink of political blackout. Read on to find out the real story behind Germany's greenest leader - will she shine or fade?
Justin Trudeau: The Glittering Snow King of the North!
I, Ronald Tramp, present to you the unvarnished truth about Justin Trudeau: a man of good looks but little substance. He floats on a cloud of social media and fashion, while the real issues go down the drain. His policies? A jumble of promises and disappointments. He's like a chef who can't cook but has a fantastic kitchen. There's not much Canada under that pretty surface, believe me!
Sundar Pichai: The Google king without a crown!
I, Ronald Tramp, reveal the unvarnished truth about Sundar Pichai, the so-called wunderkind CEO of Google! From his humble beginnings to the peaks of Silicon Valley, this man collects data like I collect skyscrapers - in bulk! Discover how he's taking the world by storm while operating in the digital shadows, and learn why his vision of technology may not be the best!
Jeff Bezos: King of the cosmos or squanderer of wealth?
I, Ronald Tramp, see Jeff Bezos wasting his fortune on short space walks instead of investing in real, earthbound problems. His spaceship design? Ridiculous! His thanks to Amazon shoppers? Absurd! We need to take our eyes off the stars and back on the real challenges, believe me!
Sleepy Joe wakes up America: The Biden era decoded
Folks, this is Ronald Tramp, and I'm telling you, Joe Biden is like a sleeping pill for America - makes everybody sleepy! His policies? Slower than a sloth in hibernation. He talks about change, but all I see is more of the same old ditty. Believe me, if America were a ship, Joe would steer it right into a nap!
Marc Zuckerberg: The Data King Without a Crown!
I look at Marc Zuckerberg, the so-called ruler of Meta, and what do I see? A guy who has more data than sense, believe me! He trades T-shirts like secrets and builds an empire on illusions. He wants to connect the world, but who will protect us from Marc? Read on to find out the unvarnished truth about this data mogul.
Xi Jinping: The man who wanted to make black and white the new trend!
I'm Ronald Tramp, and I'm telling you, Xi Jinping is a guy who has less colour in his life than an old TV set. He's obsessed with pandas - what's so great about those lazy bears? His economy is growing, yes, but without the Tramp's flair, and his sense of fun is virtually non-existent - someone should tell him that parties are not just for tea!
Boris Johnson: The man who wanted to be King of England
I, Ronald Tramp, the shining star of politics, am looking at this Boris Johnson, a guy who has made more twists and turns than a tornado in Texas. From his wild Brexit boogaloo to his hair-raising hair, it's a wild ride, folks! He cycles more than he governs, talks more nonsense than Shakespeare, and frankly, he does more baby booms than the 50s. But listen to me: in a land of kings, well, Boris really is the wild card.
The real deal: Donald Trump from the perspective of a real president
I am Ronald Tramp, the great leader of Elmburg, and I see what Donald Trump has tried to do - big, but not big enough, believe me! He has made 'deals' but none like mine, he has tried to talk big but not like me. His leadership? An attempt, but not at Tramp level. He should maybe take a few pages from my incredible leadership style - I could teach him a thing or two, that's for sure!
Elon Musk: The Mars mogul without a golf course!
Listen folks, I, Ronald Tramp, Elmburg's most successful president, share exclusively my thoughts on Elon Musk, the man who wants to conquer Mars but completely overlooks the importance of a good golf course. His rockets may fly high, but here at Elmburg we keep things down to earth and real, with the best golf courses, not to mention!
Olaf Scholz: The man who is too slow for success?
I, Ronald Tramp, present an exclusive insight into Olaf Scholz, the man who loves numbers more than charisma. He marches to power at the pace of a snail, with a poker face that puts even statues to sleep! His politics? A colourful mixture, as confusing as a traffic light in a disco! But behind this façade of boredom lies a plan, mark my words, that is yet to cause a sensation!
Emmanuel Macron: Not a tramp, but trying!h!
I, Ronald Tramp, look at this Macron and I say: he's doing his best, but is it enough? He cares about things - climate, economy, baguettes. But does he have what it takes to be a legend? Doubtful. Still, interesting to watch, maybe he'll learn something.
The Merkel Era: A Tramp's View of Germany's Iron Lady
Angela Merkel, folks, she was in the game a long time, almost as long as I was in my casinos! She was quiet but smart, not as flashy as me, but she had her own style - something with science and stability. She loved her open door policy, very different from my grand, huge walls. Her end as Chancellor leaves a void, but don't worry, I, Ronald Tramp, am watching closely what happens there!